you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
