The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize