His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize