you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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