I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
