Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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