Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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