i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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