You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
as a side note pls kill me
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
