grandma shit on top of the toilet
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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