If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
