Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Randomize