sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize