How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
How many fucks given?
0.12846
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Randomize
