If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
