I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
