Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
