I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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