so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Blood and glitter go together right?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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