New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
