i think my tv is drunk
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize