I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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