would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
