i think my tv is drunk
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
