People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
They took my balls.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize