i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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