yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize