I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
