you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
