so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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