in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
