Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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