So drunk its hurt
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Randomize
