using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize