Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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