kristin has been a bad kristin
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Randomize
