when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
