Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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