At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
