Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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