I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
