i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
