he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize