Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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