i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
