Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
