didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize