so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
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