Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
