How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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