I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
They took my balls.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
