I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
