I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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